Culinary Smackdown: Lobster!

Well, intentions were good, and anticipation was high to take on my first attempt at lobster. Unfortunately, it wasn't meant to be. At least not today. On my way to the grocers to purchase the necessities to make my smackdown dish, I was involved in a minor fender bender.


I was getting on the access road to the interstate, when the driver of a small Saturn ran a stop sign. Well, he didn't really run it. He was completely stopped. Then, right as I was approaching the intersection, to which I had the right of way, the Saturn pulled out right in front of me. I blared my horn, and slammed the breaks, but a collision was unavoidable. I hit the car, just behind the passenger door. I turned and pulled over behind the car, and a young kid got out. Young, probably early 20's. He immediately apologized to me and said, "my windows were fogged up and I couldn't see." Nice. I took that as a cue to file a police report. You know, just because.


Initial damage appears minor, but I'm not an autobody mechanic, so what do I know? Stress and tension levels are extremely elevated, and I can feel a migraine coming on. What does this mean? It means I have to forfeit my entry to the Culinary Smackdown: Lobster edition. I don't feel like cooking. I just want to lay around in my comfy clothes and take a nap.


I can, however, describe as best I can, the dish I had planned on preparing and hope for sympathy votes. So, here is what I had planned.

Ingredients

¾ pounds Penne Pasta

1 lobster, cooked, meat removed and cut into bite size pieces

3 Tablespoons Butter

3 Tablespoons Olive Oil

1 whole Onion (small)

2 cloves Garlic

½ cups White Wine (or to taste)

1 can Tomato Sauce (8 Oz)

1 cup Heavy Cream

Fresh Parsley, to taste

Fresh Basil - to taste

Salt and Pepper to taste

Instructions

Cook the penne pasta until tender-firm.

Boil or steam lobster, then remove the meat once cooked. Chop the lobster into bite –sized pieces and set aside.

Finely dice one small onion. Mince two cloves of garlic.
In a large skillet heat 2 tablespoons of butter and 2 tablespoons olive oil. Add the garlic and onion and sauté, stirring occasionally. After the garlic and onions have cooked a bit add your white wine. Let the wine evaporate for a few minutes, stirring occasionally. If you would rather not use wine, you can use low-sodium chicken broth instead (about ½ cup).

Now add an 8-ounce can of plain tomato sauce. Stir well until combined. Then add 1 cup of heavy cream. Continue stirring. Turn heat down to low and let simmer.

Now chop your herbs, about a tablespoon of chopped parsley and about the same amount of chopped basil.

Now add the lobster back into the tomato cream sauce. Give it a stir and add salt and pepper to taste. Throw in your herbs and stir until combined. Finally add your cooked penne pasta and give it a good stir. Serve and enjoy!

I’ll have to give it a try some other day. Sadface. Had I had a chance to make it, I imagine it would look something like this...

Can you please just pretend this is mine??